I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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