Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
