If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
