I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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