I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
