That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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