can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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