Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
