dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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