So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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