She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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