Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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