Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
