i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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