Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
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