How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
