There is no way he is gay with that hair.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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