Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
