Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party