This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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