so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
