omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize