Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
