But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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