id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
