so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
The power of my boobs compel you
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
