So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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