I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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