Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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