fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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