this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
