Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
