And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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