On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
