Can Purell be used as lube?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
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