it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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