I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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