Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
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Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
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Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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