Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Are my feet made of real feet?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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