she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
