Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
