she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
