He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
