we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Your cock deserves a montage
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize