Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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