It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
jump out the window naked night went bad
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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