why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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