I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize