Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
