She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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