Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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